Well done on choosing this amazing platform to share your thoughts and write them down so eloquently. You have almost written word for word the story of my style life journey. I, too, was inspired by the article in the Times on the changes experienced by Mary Portas. As a retired English teacher ( I had to take early retirement because of ill health) I looked very hard at what had happened to me and where would I go in the future. My self esteem was at rock bottom. I had been told there was a great future ahead of me in school management but in taking that road I left the very thing I loved the most and that was the classroom.
I had always valued other people’s advice as better than my own instinct and I allowed them to shape me even when I knew that it made me unhappy or uncomfortable. My anorexia had stemmed from a very unstable childhood and a need to be accepted. I thought that being thin would make me a better person from the tall, healthy and curvy girl that I was. Instead it became a monster that I allowed to control me. In recent years I have received the most wonderful counselling and feel stronger than I have felt in a long time. I wasted so much money looking for style advice and ways that I thought might make me happy. What I have learned is that style advice, colour analysis and wardrobe decluttering is only valuable when you stay true to yourself and your needs. I didn’t feel like a dramatic classic but I thought that maybe I should adopt this style. My wardrobe filled up with clothes that overwhelmed me. I wore the Soft Summer colours but they didn’t capture the sunny disposition that was mine in my childhood. I like that you encourage listening to the ‘voice’ inside and wearing what makes you function as the person you really are. I like colour but it has to be that reflected in my love of nature and the Northern light. I like comfort in my clothing and minimalism. I wear my hair very short because I like to feel neat and uncluttered. I bleach it because light hair lifts my mood and I am not going silver as I grow old! It is my one nod to the dramatic in me.
Your article filled me with joy because it truly spoke to me and made so much sense. To listen to your own voice amidst all the noise that surrounds us is truly inspiring. As my counsellor told me - diminish that anorexic voice, quieten it and give it no credit whatsoever. Thank you, Sue.
Elaine - you cannot imagine how much joy your comment about the article has given to me. It seems like we are kindred spirits. The anorexia journey is one I share, so I absolutely understand how it can impact life and the way we see ourselves for many years after the event. I am so glad that you are now in a place where you are listening, and heeding, to what you want and not what is expected from you. I was once told that our inner persona moves before our outer one catches up. What I've noticed is that if my wardrobe is telling me something, it's usually important and it pays to take heed. Thank you so much for putting your thoughts out here. I am sure there are many more readers who can take inspiration from your words.
Elaine! I loved reading your comment! It is written with such love and appreciation and inspiring! Consider writing on Substack! I think that you have much to share with us about your life experiences that would be valuable.
Firstly, congratulations on your new platform; i am really enjoying reading such interesting stories :)
Secondly, I recently read an article about the 'uniform'. As you mentioned many industries provide, or require, a uniform to be worn. A corporate uniform can speak volumes yet doesn't necessarily distinguish the personality, character or wealth of a person. It also makes life easier in the mornings when the thought of " what shall I wear?" is removed therefore allowing extra time. Threfore after reading your article I wondered just how many more of us, consciously or unconsciously, have welcomed a lifestyle uniform similar to yourself in a world so full of choice.
Great question. I’m sure there are many who adopt a uniform, especially men. Steve Jobs used a black polo neck and trousers and Mark Zuckerberg his grey T shirt and jeans to save time and energy on thinking about what to wear so they could get on with the job. Barack Obama also laid out his outfits each night so not to think about it. During my career I have seen others that do it to remain out of sight, invisible. I have also met people for whom clothes are not that important. As long as they are practical and do what they’re meant to do, they don’t much care what they look like. None are wrong. It’s who we are. My job was to help those who wanted to change and I hope I was able to assist them to find their own clothing values and their inherent voice. Next time I’ll be writing about what might happen to prevent that.
Gina! Your response got me thinking and is so relevant for today. If not outfitted by a corporation, our "COVID sweatpants" are the uniform for many as well as a demand for "business attire." Great subject which I am sure that Sue will address
Sue your wardrobe looks similar to mine but i do have a bit more colour. I feel calmer when dressed in one neutral and then one pop which you appear to have cracked. Thanks
Well done on choosing this amazing platform to share your thoughts and write them down so eloquently. You have almost written word for word the story of my style life journey. I, too, was inspired by the article in the Times on the changes experienced by Mary Portas. As a retired English teacher ( I had to take early retirement because of ill health) I looked very hard at what had happened to me and where would I go in the future. My self esteem was at rock bottom. I had been told there was a great future ahead of me in school management but in taking that road I left the very thing I loved the most and that was the classroom.
I had always valued other people’s advice as better than my own instinct and I allowed them to shape me even when I knew that it made me unhappy or uncomfortable. My anorexia had stemmed from a very unstable childhood and a need to be accepted. I thought that being thin would make me a better person from the tall, healthy and curvy girl that I was. Instead it became a monster that I allowed to control me. In recent years I have received the most wonderful counselling and feel stronger than I have felt in a long time. I wasted so much money looking for style advice and ways that I thought might make me happy. What I have learned is that style advice, colour analysis and wardrobe decluttering is only valuable when you stay true to yourself and your needs. I didn’t feel like a dramatic classic but I thought that maybe I should adopt this style. My wardrobe filled up with clothes that overwhelmed me. I wore the Soft Summer colours but they didn’t capture the sunny disposition that was mine in my childhood. I like that you encourage listening to the ‘voice’ inside and wearing what makes you function as the person you really are. I like colour but it has to be that reflected in my love of nature and the Northern light. I like comfort in my clothing and minimalism. I wear my hair very short because I like to feel neat and uncluttered. I bleach it because light hair lifts my mood and I am not going silver as I grow old! It is my one nod to the dramatic in me.
Your article filled me with joy because it truly spoke to me and made so much sense. To listen to your own voice amidst all the noise that surrounds us is truly inspiring. As my counsellor told me - diminish that anorexic voice, quieten it and give it no credit whatsoever. Thank you, Sue.
Elaine - you cannot imagine how much joy your comment about the article has given to me. It seems like we are kindred spirits. The anorexia journey is one I share, so I absolutely understand how it can impact life and the way we see ourselves for many years after the event. I am so glad that you are now in a place where you are listening, and heeding, to what you want and not what is expected from you. I was once told that our inner persona moves before our outer one catches up. What I've noticed is that if my wardrobe is telling me something, it's usually important and it pays to take heed. Thank you so much for putting your thoughts out here. I am sure there are many more readers who can take inspiration from your words.
Elaine! I loved reading your comment! It is written with such love and appreciation and inspiring! Consider writing on Substack! I think that you have much to share with us about your life experiences that would be valuable.
Firstly, congratulations on your new platform; i am really enjoying reading such interesting stories :)
Secondly, I recently read an article about the 'uniform'. As you mentioned many industries provide, or require, a uniform to be worn. A corporate uniform can speak volumes yet doesn't necessarily distinguish the personality, character or wealth of a person. It also makes life easier in the mornings when the thought of " what shall I wear?" is removed therefore allowing extra time. Threfore after reading your article I wondered just how many more of us, consciously or unconsciously, have welcomed a lifestyle uniform similar to yourself in a world so full of choice.
Great question. I’m sure there are many who adopt a uniform, especially men. Steve Jobs used a black polo neck and trousers and Mark Zuckerberg his grey T shirt and jeans to save time and energy on thinking about what to wear so they could get on with the job. Barack Obama also laid out his outfits each night so not to think about it. During my career I have seen others that do it to remain out of sight, invisible. I have also met people for whom clothes are not that important. As long as they are practical and do what they’re meant to do, they don’t much care what they look like. None are wrong. It’s who we are. My job was to help those who wanted to change and I hope I was able to assist them to find their own clothing values and their inherent voice. Next time I’ll be writing about what might happen to prevent that.
Gina! Your response got me thinking and is so relevant for today. If not outfitted by a corporation, our "COVID sweatpants" are the uniform for many as well as a demand for "business attire." Great subject which I am sure that Sue will address
!
Thank you Ellen x
Sue your wardrobe looks similar to mine but i do have a bit more colour. I feel calmer when dressed in one neutral and then one pop which you appear to have cracked. Thanks
Hi Julia, I agree. Sometimes the pop will be a bag or shoes. My own pop of choice is lipstick. That is always bright.
Sue! It is such a gift to have your incredible life insight and wardrobe wisdom available again! Thx for writing and sharing.
Thank you for reading. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it